Bu-bye, ball.

          Tomorrow, my husband will be removed of his remarkable left nut.  Contemplating this upcoming event, I wondered, should there be some sort of ceremony?  Some party to be thrown (to which my crafting mind wanders thinking of all sorts of fun and inappropriate decorations, that have to do with tennis balls and pantyhose)?  So since this, in fact, was not really my part to lose, I ask the man that will be the one with the loss.  He gives me that look that I see so very often, something between "Are you fucking crazy?" and "You are totally adorable!" with a little "Even if we are together for 50 more years, I will never understand how your mind works.", and says. No.  No party is needed.  No celebration and he declines my offer to photograph, though not sure how well THAT would scrapbook.  His plans consist of watching the Daily Show then going to bed.  For someone who is part of the "main event" he sure seems much calmer than I am. 
               I am really trying to stay positive, and I really will not miss that ball at all.  I do hope the little bastard has kept the cancer to himself, but be gone, ball, be gone.  I do worry about my husband being put under, how he will feel after, how I'll get him home and comfortable.  I worry about how he'll shower as our fence is a little to low for me to hose him off in the back yard and all the showers are on the second floor.  I worry how HE will feel after.  I worry if he will TELL me how he feels after. 
            What I don't worry about is what kind of support I will have.  So many of my wonderful friends and family members have reached out to me to offer help, distractions, and just simply words letting me know they are there.  THAT is what is bringing the tears to my eyes now.  I cannot describe how much it means to me that I know that I don't have to do this alone.  It is overwhelming how it feels to be cared for. YOU LOVE ME YOU REALLY LOVE ME!! :)  In all seriousness, I haven't had a best friend (other than my mom and sis, of course) since my early 20's, just many good friends and sometimes it makes me a little sad when I see other besties around.  But, now I know I am blessed with people in my life that would be happy to take the role on and the gratitude I have for that fills my heart.  So, thank you.  Be prepared to get an awesome key chain from Claires that says St Ends for Christmas.
             So, here we go.  The first step of the journey that I am praying ends with this remarkable left nut.  Prayers and good vibes welcome.    I am off to pour a big glass of wine and see who gets cut from DWTS, a welcome distraction from what lies ahead.